My Olympia Story

While working Sitecore between 2004 and 2016, I had visited Ukraine three times, worked with dozens of Ukrainians, and developed a great deal of respect for Ukrainian people. I mainly went to the office in Dnipro, but I also visited Kiev with Susan, who came along for at least one of my work trips.

I remember that the population seemed young and that people at work were very polite. For example, many of the guys at the office seemed to walk around the office greeting each other every morning, shaking hands and saying hello.

Being the Chief Technology Officer from America and somewhat well-known to at least the technical support department, I felt like a bit of a VIP (Very Important Person) there. Whenever I went there, I always tried to bring American gifts such as coffee, chocolate, and souvenirs from San Francisco or wherever I had been recently. They also gave me a gift once, which was a little statue of an old man fishing. I never figured out if that meant something.

I went to at least three company parties in Ukraine, which were all offsite. One was at a bowling alley. The guys would always try to get me to drink more vodka, and I certainly obliged. I don't remember missing any work as a consequence.

My last visit must have been after 2014, because that's when Russia invaded Crimea. Our vehicles had to stop at some kind of military checkpoint as we approached the conflict zone. That party was outdoors, near a river.

Anyway, after Russia invaded Ukraine again in 2022, I wanted to help Ukrainians. I actually offered my house for refugees, but that never worked out. I helped one refugee in Portland, but she had a reasonable Ukrainian community and didn't really need my help.

In the process, I met a woman named Anna that spoke Russian. Many Ukrainians speak Russian, though I think almost all speak Ukrainian as well. Though Ukrainian and Russian are different cultures, the language are somehow similar and I think they share a character set or the character sets are similar, as they are between Lao and Thai as well.

I was living in Portland, Oregon, and Anna was living almost two hours away in Olympia, Washington. She claimed to be helping Ukrainian refugees, especially one woman with children. I made arrangements to meet her and brought a load of things with me - mostly toys and clothes that my children had outgrown but also things like postage stamps and I think a bit of cash. The drive both ways seemed a bit long for one day, I needed a little get away, and I had never been to Olympia, so I booked a hotel at the Red Lion hotel there.

Anna and I agreed to meet in the evening, but she flaked, so I was on my own. I checked in to the hotel and then walked around. I stopped at a bar for at least one beer. This was around the time of BLM and DEI, so I didn't recognize that the rainbow flags at the bar indicated that it was a gay bar, especially because I spent most of my time talking to what I assume was a heterosexual couple.

Then I went to a Mexican steak house nearby, which was really good. I think I had a couple of Mojitos at the restaurant.

On the way back to the hotel, I started looking for some weed. I thought about going into a shop, but ran into someone on the street that said they could help me. I walked with them to an apartment complex, and they went into a unit for something like twenty minutes, which seemed much too long. I don't remember how much weed I got, but I smoked a joint and then gave the roach to some homeless person.

Then I went back to the bar. Soon, there was a DJ playing, which turned out to be the bar owner. I probably had a few beers, which help me to start dancing, and I might have been a bit friendly. I remember approaching some old lady on the dance floor and saying something like "I'm not here to get laid, but do you want to dance?" She did, until more people came out, at which point the woman said something like "You may not be here to get laid, but I am." I think by this time I realized that it was a gay bar, possibly oriented towards lesbians (the owner/DJ was female).

At one point I set my drink down on a merch table. I ended up buying a sweatshirt that night, but forgot it there before I left. I specifically remember the bar owner moving my drink, and I suspect that she may have added something to it at that moment. I have found that some lesbians really don't like heterosexual men, especially when they might appear as competition for other women.

I danced for a while and then headed towards the bathroom. I was not drunk and didn't do anything inappropriate. I think I tapped a guy on the shoulder and asked him to let him know that I needed to get past him. He reacted in a very friendly way, but the bouncer immediately came over and told me that I had to leave. Maybe I still didn't get the gay aspect, but apparently this was considered picking up on the guy or inappropriate touching or something.

I had never been kicked out of a bar before. As I walked out, I said "fuck you" to the bouncer. I don't remember the next several hours after I walked out that door.

I basically woke up, completely naked, totally sober, walking around Olympia, with no phone, no wallet, no hotel room key, and no idea where I was relative to the hotel. I walked into the parking lot of what I assume was a bar. There were a lot of people on the stairs and railing outside and several more in the parking lot. I could swear I heard something like "hey, it's that dude from Portland."

I walked directly up to a big guy, maybe thirty years old, that looked Lebanese or something but spoke with an American accent. He immediately suggested that I needed some clothes, opened the trunk of a car, and pulled out a long T-shirt and some shoes that were much too big for me. I gave him a little bit of context, expressed that I was very thankful, and got directions towards the Red Lion.

As I was walking to the hotel, a car containing what I think were several teenagers or very young adult males kept driving by. I must have looked helpful or crazy or something. They seemed to be ensuring that I would reach the hotel.

When I got to there, I explained that I didn't have my key, and they let me into the room. I asked if they had any security cameras, because I really wanted to know what had happened, but they said none were working.

My keys, phone, wallet, and clothes were in the room, so it appeared that I had gone there before getting naked, and that I had not been robbed. Strangely, my underwear were soaking wet next to the bathroom sink, as if I had washed them but not hung them up to dry. I didn't have any evidence that I had been sexually assaulted, so I honestly don't know if someone brought me to the hotel or if I managed my way back on my own before stripping naked and leaving, which I think would have gotten the attention of the hotel staff.

When I met her the next morning, Anna explained that she was actually Russian and had been born in the Soviet Union. We transferred my things into her vehicle and I left with plans to keep working together. Eventually we lost touch and I started to wonder if she was actually helping poor Russians rather than actually helping Ukrainians. I never met the woman that I was supposedly helping.

When I got back to Portland, I called the Olympia police to file a report. I suspected that I might have been at least drugged. When I've told other guys this story, some have related similar experiences or told me that they thought I was probably ruffied. Maybe the street weed had been laced, but that should have affected me much sooner. I don't often black out from alcohol, hadn't had that much to drink, had eaten enough, and was relatively clearheaded until I left the bar and when I woke up. The police apparently thought I was crazy or making things up or something, because they wouldn't file the report, but they also wouldn't explain why they wouldn't.

I also called the bar, which I still strongly suspect had been involved, but they never answered. I think that on one of my attempts I told some of my story to their answering service, and also that I needed to get a refund for the sweatshirt. Since they never called me back, I eventually contested some percentage of the charge with my credit card company, but acccpted some of it as valid for the cost of my drinks that night.